“Now, just so you know, this never happened.”
He says this with such a serious tone that i think he’s serious. Wait – he *is* serious.
Technically, doctors are not supposed to experiment on their patients with drug samples … but when a professional acquaintance offered my doctor some free donated human allograft tissue, my doctor couldn’t resist. He took the sample and bumped up my appointment 20 hours; apparently, amniotic fluid from a person’s placenta has a pretty short shelf-life. They kept it on dry ice until i arrived, and only after i was there … only after my clothes were off, and the needles were brought out, and the vials had been thawed out from being vigorously rubbed between the hands of two nurses … only then did he tell me that (1) “… this never happened” and (2) “This is going to hurt.”
Luckily, I talked him into at least putting Lidocaine on my skin before he inserted the amniotic fluid, and the pain ended up being minimal. I could feel the needle rummaging around beneath my skin, bumping into scar tissue so heavy that my doctor had to take a break in between vials because it was hurting his hand. I resisted the urge to crack an inappropriate joke about sexual orientation and hand muscles, and i resisted ANOTHER urge when he said that poking through my scar tissue was like trying to poke wood.
I could feel the needle moving underneath my skin even hours after the procedure.
Hopefully, this helps. The purpose is to try to reboot my tissue cells into regenerating themselves, as we continue to try to collapse the hole with external pressure. If you’re confused, trust me: You are not alone.